I'm probably not the only one to say this and most likely you're sick of hearing this, but it's absolutely mind-blowing that we are now in September.
Since my last Talking Personal, not a lot has happened in my own personal life, but more so the world itself. Especially in Victoria. COVID-19 has really reared it's ugly side and with that brings a whole host of emotions, chaos and whatever else that could be wrong this year. Still, I'm trying not to dwell on the negatives. Even if some days aren't as great as others. So what have I been doing?
Well, I got stood down from work, so I've had 5 months of trying to fill out my days.
I re-found my love for reading. I read and read and read and read. So much reading during the months of April to July. It was so enjoyable and pushed me to reconnect with the book blog and booktube community. There's been some great people I've gotten to know because of it! And of course with reconnecting with booktube it means I've been filming videos again. Something I didn't realise I was missing until I restarted.
I was able to reflect on myself and my goals, including 2020. Yes, this year hasn't turned out the way anyone has wanted it to be. Yet, to be frank, I lost control of the last 2 years of my life and couldn't see a way out. So being able to sit back and really deep dive on who I am and what I want really allowed me to realise that there are some things that will happen out of my control, but what matters is the actions and behaviours that I exhibit within these restraints that work towards goal progression. I am really proud of myself for being able to tick off each goal, no matter how small, in the last few months. It's shown me that I am capable of achieving what I set out to achieve.
I watched a lot of Korean dramas for a few months, and started a Korean drama review blog. Unfortunately, it's collecting dust at the moment, as I've now moved over to rewatching Criminal Minds. When it comes to TV shows/movies I really cannot multitask or watch different ones at the same time. In line with Korean dramas or Korean culture I guess, is my attempt at re-learning Korean. It hasn't been as consistent as it should be when you're learning a language but I'm getting there. Slowly.
Still, there's been a lot of eating, lying around and having a terrible sleeping pattern. Alongside getting dolled up for random photoshoots (don't laugh) and then finally, and the most recently, giving myself a haircut. I took scissors to my hair 2 weeks ago and I loved every moment of it. If anything, it means I've learnt a new skill that'll save me some money in the future!
I've been trying to see this as time given back to me. Time, a lot of time honestly, that you wouldn't expect to have until retirement really. I try to ask myself when I'm feeling unmotivated and dejected, how would I feel/what would I think looking back on this time now and how I spent it. Don't get me wrong, this isn't easy, if anything the extension of the lockdown makes it harder to stay positive and motivated. Everyone's feelings are valid. You don't have to be cheerful and energetic everyday. We've been deprived from the things that humans normally thrive on as well as added stressors that make it more difficult. But this is the situation we've found ourselves in. We can only do so much with what we have. It's a matter of what you want to do and how you want to face each day.
Sending love and good vibes to everyone out there.
